At school and often the home we are expected to achieve a certain norm. However, if you are born with individual traits that don't fit the norm then such traits may be ignored or disrespected. This may be sensed rather than stated or both.
Therefore who we are is not ‘valued’ as it should be. You may be loved and cared for but it is this ‘not meeting the norm’ that may result is loss of self-esteem.
In order to rectify the situation we may either attempt to ‘fit in’ to the social norm, which in doing so may cause ourselves huge stress or anxiety. Alternately, we withdraw and sit on the sideline of groups.
How to find your self-esteem:
Working with an appropriate therapist is often very helpful as it will enable you discovering aspects of yourself the you may have dishonoured especially aspects of empathy, intuition and creativity. Often we have experienced clients remembering incidents when they have “saved the day’ through having these abilities.